Dandiya politics: It was a Rajya Soap-a opera in Gujarat, minor characters’ stock rose sharply 😜

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In Gujarat, the all-powerful Shah-and-Shah has for once been bested by Patel rap. In the land of the dhokla, the ruling party was forced to admit someone had given it a dhokha. Never before in the history of Indian news television has so much air time been spent on a single Rajya Sabha seat as on Gujarat’s recent Rajya Soap-a opera. While BJP attempted to stage a Hum Log by gathering all MLAs under its umbrella, Congress’s Ahmed Patel proved that it’s best not to meddle with the old guard kyonki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi.

The Gujarat face-off was also like a T20 match where the scoreboard kept shifting every hour. The eventual winner in the Amit Shah vs Ahmed Patel contest was decided by the Duckworth Lewis system with EC playing ‘neutral’ umpire. Batsman and bowler were the centre of attention but the ball was actually in the hands of a deep third man.

For Gujaratis who expertly track the rise and fall of the stock market, this was a day when politics became dalal street. The characters in the drama, erstwhile minor netas who suddenly became national figures, saw their stock rise sharply and command more political equity than ever before. The share price of the Gujarat MLA skyrocketed as the political market readied for a bull run.

For example Chhotubhai Vasava, the single JD(U) MLA from a remote constituency in Bharuch suddenly became a market sensation, causing the madcap index to swing wildly. There were diametrically opposite reports about how Vasava had actually voted. While his party declared he had voted BJP, he kept insisting he had voted for Congress. In the end Chhotubhai became Patel’s bada bhai when it was ‘revealed’ he had in fact voted for him. Another MLA, NCP’s Jayantbhai Patel Boskey, clearly felt he held the key. Boskey played Big Boss, keeping both sides on the edge.

Navratra came early to Gujarat with netas playing political dandiya. But those who carried big sticks could not prevent others from dancing in circles. Earlier we saw the Congress play the politics of the last resort to defeat BJP by airlifting its MLAs to Bengaluru. But this single setback in Gujarat is only a minor correction in the BJP’s sensex which is zooming to new heights. Citizens however are suffering from market pessimism. In Gujarat, floods have claimed more than 200 lives this year and soon murky political floodwaters may rise above voters’ heads.

DISCLAIMER : This article is intended to bring a smile to your face. Any connection to events and characters in real life is coincidental.

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